I believe there is a young, naive, scarred and scared inner-child within us all. One of the activities I support clients through is writing a letter to their inner child. Not only is it a healing process to move through as an exercise, it also offers depth and ideas of ways to talk to your inner child when you feel his/her grip as an impulse or compulsive reaction. What we deny, avoid or run from, ends up controlling us. When you shine your loving light and attention on the various subconscious characters that take the wheel, you give them space to move and release on their own. If you have the intention of releasing or removing these characters, they can get stronger instead of weaker. When your intention is simply holding loving space, meeting the sensations and emotions, you allow your wise system to do the work for you.
I highly recommend you carve out 20 minutes to write a love letter to little-you. Tell him or her what you needed to hear when you were young. Send thanks, love, appreciation, praise, gratitude, forgiveness, a warm embrace, and full acceptance.
As an example, here is my letter ;)
Dear Mare Bear,
I love you. I love your sass, your strength, and your humor. I love your tenacity. I love that you would walk into the room as a five year old and fully believe you are the strongest person in the room. I love how you never shy away from conflict and are willing to literally step in with your fists up when it means protecting those you love.
I am sorry for every time I let you believe that you weren’t enough. I am sorry for letting you compare and judge your body on a daily basis, and for allowing you to think for years that your size was a testament to how worthy you are of love. I am sorry that you heard and saw so many examples of poor nutrition, toxic self-talk and unhealthy relationships with food. It’s not your fault. You were young, impressionable. You knew you were destined for great things in this life and you did everything you could with the information and support you had. You are perfectly imperfect.
I know you were doing the best that you could.
I know that your heart is pure and full of love.
I know that even when you showed up as a bully, it wasn’t intended to be malicious and you didn’t know the long term impacts such actions could have.
I forgive you for every temper tantrum, every lie you told, every dollar you stole, and every cruel comment you expressed. I forgive you, and I give you full permission to forgive and love yourself.
I love you and am so grateful for who you are and who you have grown into being.
From now on, anytime I feel you creep to the surface needing attention, I promise to slow down and listen. I see you. You don’t have to hide or pretend to be something that you are not. I hear you. You don’t have to worry about saying the wrong thing, being left out, being made fun of, or trying to impress anyone. I love you, for who you are, for who you wanted to be before you were ready, for who you knew you could be, for who you needed to be, and for who you have allowed me to become.
Little me, I love you.
For more activities like this one, reach out to inquire about one on one coaching, group workshops, team building, or my upcoming online program. Head here to register your email and receive the first two chapters of my book for free (which has lots of exercises and resources to play with as well).
I am gathering emails of people who want to be a part of some test-piloting for a couple programs I am creating. If you’re intrigued, hit me up ;)